Survival of Distance Relationships

Survival of Distance Relationships

By Herbert Mtowo

Long distance relationships.SUKS!!! Don’t you think so guys?

Especially with this in mind, sure I agree with you:

What with our minds bombarded with thoughts like these;

· What is he/she doing right now?

· With whom?

· Why he/she didn’t answer my call?

· Why he/she didn’t reply my sms?

· Why he/she didn’t email/call/contact me today?

· Does she/he know that I miss her/him?

· Is she/he thinking of me today?

The list continues on and on you can add those any thoughts, fears and questions that flood your mind as you think of your loved one who is in another location or as travelled for several weeks because of work. But believe me distance is not the real issue but character of the lovers involved.

(Pro 9:11-18) Wisdom will add years to your life.

(Pro 9:12) You are the one who will profit if you have wisdom, and if you reject it, you are the one who will suffer.


Have you ever thought of the challenge that we all face day in and day out? It is not a secret anymore, even very young kids in junior schools are being taught about it at schools. Millions of lives have been lost, hundreds of thousands have been affected, still millions more are bed ridden and others are carrying it in their bodies. Billions and billions of money have been spent on research and laboratory tests, projects which cost billions initiated all over the world that is to fight this dreaded enemy of our day. Yes, you guessed it right; I am talking about HIV/AIDS.

Song 3:5 Promise me, women of Jerusalem; swear by the swift deer and the gazelles that you will not interrupt our love.

Relationships have been interrupted by so many things in this present day. Extra marital affairs are one of the biggest interruptions of our day and age. This happens not necessarily because people are away from each other or because they live in different locations.

I live in a continent and Region where more people have been infected, countless deaths and many orphans’ have been left as a result of the impact of HIV/AIDS.I have personally lost friends, loved ones, neighbors’ and workmates. And still no cure, no solution in sight at least for now. But it`s not all gloom and darkness for this generation. You and I have a big part to play and we must make a mark and live lasting impressions of having contributed immensely to humanity.

I am talking about relationships, sex, and marriage and dating here. Have you ever realized that, it is a proven fact that we get the virus through many ways, am sure we know all that, but 99.9% through sexual intercourse, whichever way you do it? So Herbert, tell me more do distance relationships really work? Once again with a resounding “YES”, I put my head on the block and go on read this article. At the end of it your eyes will have been opened and hope you turn your sorrow into joy, your mourning into gladness.

It`s not only HIV/AIDS which has become a big challenge and threat to relationships, but what with the divorce rate escalating sky high daily, children being abandoned due to pursuits of extra marital relationships. Let me take you through a journey as I pour my heart in black and white, to open your eyes to these and many issues around relationships.

One factor stands high, above them all, if ever we are to deal with relational challenges and tensions. I will dwell much on the influence that character and personality play in solidifying a relationship or straining it and bring about disharmony and cheating.

Pro 7:18 Come on! Let’s make love all night long. We’ll be happy in each other’s arms. (Pro 7:19) my husband isn’t at home. He’s on a long trip. (Pro 7:20) He took plenty of money with him and won’t be back for two weeks."

Where is God, we all are asking? Is he standing akimbo or aloof somewhere in space, watching as humanity perishes like ants every day? Everyone is at risk, yes I mean everybody including you and me. That scripture reading from Proverbs, makes you realize that distant relationships have had their own fair share of challenges just like normal relationships, like those who live together, under the same roof. It is not true that, people are only unfaithful when they travel or when they work in different geographical locations, those living together experience the same challenges too. But there are two important factors that I want to mention, in this article. A person`s character and personality contribute more to unfaithfulness, than distance, travel and most of the factors we always point to as the reasons for the demise of any relationship.

If you read the scripture at the beginning of this paragraph, you will realize that, there are two main factors at play in that woman`s life, namely the personality and the character of the woman which both contribute immensely to her actions, more than the husband having traveled. Personality what you are and character is what you have been shaped up to be, by family, environment, beliefs, past experiences and interactions with friends. The husband might have traveled for sure, but she made love or wanted to make love being driven by her character and personality. Husband or no husband around, she still could have done it, whilst the husband having not travelled either.

To be continued